Most shadow work prompts I find online are surprisingly polite.
They ask what you are grateful for and how you can show yourself compassion, which is lovely and is not shadow work.
Shadow work is the material you exiled because you were told it was unacceptable, and for a lot of women that material is not sadness or fear.
It is anger. Appetite. Ambition. The wanting of things.
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So these prompts go after that specifically. They are grouped by theme; they get progressively less comfortable, and I would not recommend doing them all in one sitting unless you have a free evening and nothing on tomorrow.
A few notes on how to use them. Write longer than feels necessary, because the honest answer is usually three sentences past the first one.
Nobody reads this but you, so resist the urge to write a version you would be comfortable having found. And if a prompt makes you want to skip it, that is the one. (Annoying, but consistently true.)
If you want the context behind all of this, what is dark feminine energy explains the concept properly.
Prompts on Anger
- When was the last time I was angry and called it something else?
- What am I still angry about that I have decided is unreasonable to still be angry about?
- Who taught me that my anger was too much? What exactly did they do?
- What would I say to the person I am angriest at if there were no consequences?
- Where in my body do I feel anger, and what do I usually do to make it stop?
- What boundary was crossed the last time I felt genuine rage?
- Whose anger was I most afraid of growing up, and how did I learn to prevent it?
- What would change in my life if I treated my anger as accurate?
- What am I angry at myself about, and is the charge fair?
- When I imagine expressing anger cleanly, what am I afraid will happen?
Prompts on Boundaries
- What am I currently tolerating that I would advise a friend to leave?
- What did I say yes to this month that I did not want to do, and why did I say it?
- Who in my life expects access to me that they have not earned?
- What is the longest justification I have given recently for a simple no?
- What do I do to make my refusals more palatable, and what does it cost me?
- Where am I doing the emotional work of an adult who could be doing it themselves?
- What would I have to stop doing if I decided my time was as valuable as theirs?
- What relationship would change the most if I stopped over-explaining myself?
- What am I afraid people will call me if I hold a line?
- Which of my boundaries do I state clearly, and which do I hint at and hope for?
Prompts on Desire and Appetite
- What do I want that I have never said out loud to another person?
- What do I want that I have decided is too much to want?
- When did I learn that wanting things was unattractive?
- What would I pursue if nobody would find out I had failed?
- What am I pretending not to care about?
- What do I envy, and what does the envy tell me about my own appetite?
- If money were not a factor, what would my week actually look like?
- What pleasure do I ration, and who taught me to ration it?
- What have I called impractical that I actually just felt unentitled to?
- What do I want from my life that would sound presumptuous if I described it?
Prompts on the Parts You Hide
- What version of myself do I keep away from most people?
- What was I called as a child that I have organized my personality around never being again?
- What quality of mine gets described as a flaw that I suspect is a strength?
- What do I do only when nobody is watching?
- What would people be surprised to learn I think about?
- Which of my opinions do I keep quiet to stay likable?
- What part of myself did I retire to make a specific person comfortable?
- If I stopped managing how I come across, what would people notice first?
- What am I most afraid someone would find out about me, and is it actually bad?
- What do I judge harshly in other women, and where does that judgment live in me?
Prompts on Power and Ambition
- Where do I have more power than I am currently using?
- What would I ask for if I were certain I deserved it?
- When did I last make myself smaller in a room, and what triggered it?
- What do I dilute about myself in professional settings?
- What number would I name if I were not afraid of the pause afterward?
- Who benefits most from me underestimating myself?
- What have I let someone else take credit for?
- What am I capable of that I have never tested?
- What would I do differently if I were not worried about being seen as arrogant?
- What does success look like when I describe it only to myself?
Prompts on What You Have Survived
- What did I go through that changed what I will accept?
- What do I know now that I wish I had not had to learn?
- Who was I before, and what do I miss about her?
- What did I forgive too quickly in order to keep the peace?
- What am I still protecting myself from that is no longer happening?
- Where has my armor outlived its usefulness?
- What did I lose that I have not properly been angry about?
- Who owes me an apology I am never going to get, and what do I do with that?
- What would I tell the version of me who was in the worst of it?
- What did surviving that give me that I would not give back?
How to Actually Work With These
Pick one theme, not one prompt. Sit with four or five from the same section in a single sitting, because the pattern across the answers is usually more revealing than any individual response.
Do the anger section first if you are new to this. It is the most accessible, and it tends to unlock the others, since almost everything underneath is anger with a different label on it.
Come back to the same prompt in three months. The answers move, and the movement is the evidence that anything is happening.
And if you find yourself writing a measured, reasonable answer, stop and write the unreasonable one underneath it. The measured version is the shadow doing its job.
For the practical side of this, what is dark feminine energy covers what to do with what you find, and the dark feminine energy quiz will show you where you are starting from.